


Some nights feel like every night, this one feels brand new

by Milieu



Category: Bandom, Black Veil Brides, Falling in Reverse
Genre: Alternate Universe, Fluff and Angst, Getting Back Together, Idiots in Love, M/M, Past Relationship(s)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-25
Updated: 2017-05-25
Packaged: 2018-11-04 15:17:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10993566
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Milieu/pseuds/Milieu
Summary: Years down the line, Andy comes back and Ronnie isn't sure how to feel.





	Some nights feel like every night, this one feels brand new

**Author's Note:**

> The distant sequel to the other short fics I've written for this pairing and setting. Title comes from "Sweet Disaster" by Dreamers.

Andy looked different. That was the first thing that really occurred to Ronnie once he got a good look. Andy had gone off for four years to some swanky music school out in California and Ronnie had stayed right here, fumbling through getting his GED, moving out of his broken home, and stumbling into a real job. In the interim, Andy had cut off all his hair (why), grown another two inches ( _why_ ), and gotten a bunch of tattoos (not bad, actually, though Ronnie's pride insisted that they would have been even better if Andy had gotten them done at the parlor where Ronnie worked now). Andy carried himself a little differently now, moved more confidently. He had become a vegetarian, apparently. He mentioned people in the music industry that Ronnie recognized, and spoke as though he personally knew them.

If Ronnie were really being honest with himself about it (he wasn't), he would have admitted that he found all of the changes just a bit intimidating. Like Andy belonged to a different world now that he had no place in, no matter what they had been before they went their separate ways.

But god - when the tattoo parlor's front bell rang and Ronnie looked up and saw him, Andy's eyes lit up just the same as they always had, and his smile was exactly how Ronnie remembered it.

They hugged, or rather Andy hugged Ronnie and Ronnie despairingly noted that Andy had gotten stronger as well as taller while all the breath was squeezed out of his lungs. His face was pressed into Andy's shoulder; Andy smelled like cigarettes, leather, and aftershave. There was something arousingly masculine and new about it (like most of the other changes, though Ronnie wasn't quite willing to admit that yet), and he extricated himself from Andy's grasp before he could dwell on it too much.

"We should do something when you get off work," Andy said as enthusiastically as ever after they had spent some time shooting the breeze. "We could grab dinner and go for a drive."

And fuck him, Ronnie could never say no to Andy no matter how he tried, so after some protests that were more for show than anything, he found himself agreeing.

\---

It was a rainy night, though the weather didn't seem to put a damper on Andy's spirits. He chattered all through dinner about his former roommates and what they had gotten up to, about tentative ventures into music production that just might turn into a record deal, about the cats he had adopted. Ronnie didn't exactly like hearing him talk about all of these adventures that he himself hadn't been witness to, but he also clumsily demurred whenever Andy tried to ask about what he had been up to in the last few years. They had seen each other periodically, of course, but Andy's visits had gotten fewer and further in between as he got busier and busier with school and whatever else he was doing out in California, and at some point Ronnie hadn't been comfortable calling anymore.

He knew he wasn't being a good conversation partner. He could tell from the way Andy's grin dimmed just a bit every time Ronnie brushed him off that he was being a spoilsport for whatever fun reunion Andy had had in mind, but he couldn't stop himself. He had always been like this when he was uncomfortable, and as much as he hated it, he  _was_ uncomfortable in Andy's presence now. The gulf between who and where Ronnie was and where Andy had been, the things he had done, and the person he had become was inescapable. By the time they paid and left (and Ronnie refused to let Andy pick up the check on his own, no matter how pathetic his own bank account might be in comparison), their conversation had stuttered to a halt, and Andy looked markedly uncomfortable as well.

The rain had started in earnest, and it drummed against the windshield of Andy's car (a nice car, the kind of car that Andy had fantasized aloud about having as a teenager) in a way that might have been soothing if not for the tense silence that sat between them. Ronnie kept his eyes fixed out the window at the landscape passing by in the fading twilight.

"What's wrong?" He had been so lost in thought that Andy's voice startled him.

"Huh? Nothing."

Andy's fingers drummed on the steering wheel. "Was it something I did?"

"What- no, of course not. What are you talking about?"

Andy's somewhat put-off expression deepened into an actual frown. He watched the lights of the city pass by for a few moments before responding. "Well, you don't seem very happy to see me."

Some kind of knot twisted in Ronnie's chest. "I never said that."

"I know, but-" Andy stopped himself, shifting in his seat like he wanted to turn to Ronnie but not taking his eyes off the road. "I dunno. Sorry." It was clear from his tone that he did know exactly what was bothering him, but he didn't say anything further until he pulled over at the little picnic hollow near the cemetery.

They had come here a lot after Andy's late-night blogging adventure way back when. They stuck to evenings when they knew nobody else would be around save maybe Jinxx, the cemetery caretaker that Andy had formed some sort of odd friendship with. He had that way with people, seeking them out and latching onto them when nobody else felt the need. That was how he and Ronnie had become friends, this talented, strange-minded, brilliant rising star and the sullen boy from a broken home that nobody except Andy seemed to see any potential in.

Ronnie supposed that, deep down, he had always expected Andy to go his own way sooner rather than later and that he would forget all about him. About  _them_. That was why this show of coming back, Andy trying to slot himself right back into Ronnie's life like he belonged there, just felt like twisting the knife. Everyone except for Andy always seemed to realize that he was destined for better things.

So when the first thing that came out of Andy's mouth after a long, discomforting silence was "I missed you," Ronnie's first instinct was to laugh. He didn't mean to, really, and he hated himself all the more when he saw the surprise and hurt written across Andy's face, but he couldn't help it.

"Why?" He blurted out as soon as he could speak.

"Why wouldn't I?" There was no hint in Andy's voice or expression that he had even considered the possibility. He probably hadn't. God, he had probably filed away all of those little memories that he shared at dinner with the express purpose of relating them to Ronnie later. He had looked so excited at the beginning of the night.

Ronnie couldn't meet his eyes and turned back to the window, throat tight. God fucking damn Andy, always complicating his life and forcing him to acknowledge how much he really did want to be happy.

Andy's hand inched across space between their seats, hesitating for just a moment before settling over Ronnie's. Ronnie drew in a sharp breath (and part of him noted with mild annoyance that Andy's hands seemed bigger than his now too. What the hell did they feed him?).

"Ronnie." Andy's voice was gentle, but that pleading note that Ronnie recognized so well was still there, nagging him like always. Andy's thumb rubbed circles over his wrist and down over the spot where his pulse jumped.

"You didn't have to come back, you know."

"Of course I did." He could see Andy's head tilt to the side out of the corner of his eye. Still trying to figure each other out, after all these years both together and apart.

God, he was... 

He was terrified.

That was it, Ronnie realized. He was fucking scared. Of Andy, of what Andy meant to him, of the possibility that he might get hurt after all he had put up with in life already. Of the idea that Andy might want Ronnie as much as Ronnie wanted him, and whether he would be dragging Andy down to his level if he accepted that.

"I missed you too." He couldn't bear to raise his voice, almost hoped that his words were drowned out by the pattering of the rain. By the way Andy's hand tightened on his, he knew that they hadn't been.

"I'm sorry I didn't visit more often," Andy said when Ronnie didn't continue. "You always seemed busy when I was here. I thought I was bothering you."

Ronnie huffed out a sigh, forced irritation to cover anything else that might well up. "You're always bothering me. That's what you do." But he laced his fingers into Andy's and squeezed tightly just in case Andy thought to take his words at face value and pull away.

Still out of the corner of his eye, he saw Andy smile. He was almost inclined to smile back, but Andy's next words stopped all thought in its tracks.

"I love you."

Instead of answering, Ronnie made a noise like all of the air being let out of a tire.

"What," he rasped, once he found his voice again.

Andy just blinked at him with those eyes. "Is it too soon to say something like that?"

"Too soon- we've known each other for ten years, you dickbag!" Disbelief and aggravation fueled him enough to look at Andy head-on for once.

Andy was smiling. Ronnie wasn't sure if he wanted to kiss him or strangle him.

His body made the decision before his brain consciously did, grabbing Andy's face with both hands and almost hauling him into the passenger seat to kiss him hard. Andy kissed back with no protest, fingers stroking over Ronnie's jaw. He was still smiling, Ronnie could feel it.

"You're crazy," was the only thing Ronnie could think to say once they broke apart, breathless.

"I guess so," Andy agreed before leaning in to kiss him again.

"I love you too," Ronnie added softly, half-hoping again that it would be hidden by the rain and the sound of their breathing.

By the way Andy held him tighter and closer, he knew it hadn't been.


End file.
